All I can say is....

Hello again!  (Yes, I know, shaddap.)

So a few months ago, out of sleep-deprived morbid curiosity, I engulfed myself into the whole Brony-Neckbeard-Fedora-Friendzone thing.  No, I didn't go down to my local Wally World and pick up my own pin-striped can of vagina repellent.  I didn't mope my way into Hot Topic and get the newest vinyl My Little Pony abomination.  And I certainly didn't saunter into a GameStop, fingers all a'cheeze to get the latest whatever-the-fuck video game and call someone a "filthy casual".  What I did do was sit at home and laugh at those asswipes.

A little break-down.  One night my lovely wife and I decided to watch "Bronies" on NetFlix.  Ho. Lee. Shit.  These fuckers are weird.  And I'm saying that from my golden pedestal of virginity-prolonging Star Trek fandom.  But these are men obsessed with a show made for little girls.  Let that sink in for a minute.  They buy the toys.  They wear the clothes. THEY GO TO THE CONVENTIONS.  One of them had a girlfriend that they met through the MLP forums or something, and I can only imagine the WTF Pony sex they have.  (On a side note, in that particular relationship, you could tell that the guy was WAY more into the pony thing than she was, and even she seemed a little creeped out by it.)  I could go on, point-by-point, about how fucking disturbing this entire documentary was, but that may be another post.  TLDR; Bronies are fucking weird.

The whole fedora thing struck a special place in my funnybone because I know at least 2 guys that have them and wear them regularly. "But Dinosaur Man," you say, "fedoras are manly and Indy wore one."  And you'd be correct.  Fedoras are, in my humble opinion, pretty cool hats.  Where my rage laughter comes in (and you'll find this all over the internet) is that these douche crowns, while technically being fedoras, are in fact called trilbys.  Now, while there are guys who can pull the look off, the fact is that it's really only women who look good in these hats.  And that's mostly because of the stigma most of the trilby-wearers have sprayed all over the hat itself.  But after way too many hours scouring the web that fateful day, I'll leave you with this infographic (Sorry if it's tiny)--

There ya go.  Know the difference.

Now, the point of this post.  Remember how I said I know 2 guys who wear these fucking things?  I just saw this--

I went with the more diplomatic reply.  What I was thinking was "Well, at least now you can be warm in the friendzone."

-The Dinosaur Hunter

One battle down.....

Starfest has come and gone, and my con season along with it.  This year was considerably better than last year, as I actually got out of the room and got to hang out with my chosen family, and actually see the convention.  And amidst my fond reflections, one big thing jumps to mind, making me smile.  "Cosplay =/= Consent."  And that smile holds a touch of schadenfreude.

First, for a bit of a illumination.  In early April, 16-bit Sirens, a group of self-proclaimed "entertaining, genuine, and approachable ambassadors to geek culture" started a movement called CONsent.  This was inspired by the #INeedFeminismBecause trend/meme/whatever that had spread like smallpox across Facebook and the rest of the web.  Personally, I think it was also inspired by our buddy Tony Harris's super-thoughtful discourse on male/female relations as they pertain to the geek subculture (see previous entry).

Needless to say, the internet white knights came out in full force.  Cosplayers (shudder) making posts about how they only cosplay characters they deeply care about, and only do sexy costumes is the character is sexy get an insane showing of support from guys shouting "your so beutiful" and fellow cosplayers cyber-chest-bumping with "Oh I love you, you're my bestie," all under the gloriously colorful "=/=" banner.  It's a touching movement, for someone.

Now I, being me, have seen where all this altruism and white-knightery leads.  And it ain't pretty.  So admittedly, I was a little on edge about how my beloved Starfest would change under the new unofficially-official bosses.  I mean, I complement pretty girls in well-made costumes.  I like to talk to people at cons, and I tend to flirt a little.  We all laugh, are loudly inappropriate, and have an insanely good time.  How would this change?

Not a damn bit.

Our first day there, K and I were hanging out down in the atrium, waiting for a friend and people-watching.  The costumes were out, but not in full force.  There was a group of mid to late teen girls off to our right in the obligatory skimpy for skimpy's sake costumes, hanging out in the same group they have been for a few years, taking a picture for some random con-goer.  Then they all gathered and sat on a brick planter.  And people walked by.  Continually.  You could see the looks of confusion and disappointment building on the girls faces as people gave them a wide berth.  No one was rude, they were just totally uninterested.  And K was laughing.  "Here's what your internet bitching gets you," she says.  And she was so totally right.  Others have seen the cosplay drama, and decided not to feed into it.  And these teenage girls, whether they ever had anything to do with it or not, represented the demographic that has caused all the commotion.  And your average con-going geek is tired of it.  White Knighting on the internet is easy, but in real life, those same guys go into hiding.  Granted, as the con burned on and more and more kids (this year had a a LOT of newbies for some reason) showed up, the status quo returned.  I watched one girl in a good Black Cat costume pose for at least 15 minutes for 2 or 3 drooling guys snapping literally hundreds of pictures apiece.

But for one all too fleeting moment, it was fantastic.

There was a group carrying around a crude sign reading "Cosplay =/= Consent" sign, and asking people to take pictures holding it.  The album went up on a Facebook page for the con, and there are 30 pictures.  Most of the same 4 or 5 people.  The two comments on the album are "Sad that anyone needs reminding/telling" and "Sad that there were supposedly still some there who did not get that."  I did not see this sign once at the con.  And were I asked to hold it for a photo (as usual, I was in my theropod-slaying best), I would have politely declined.  Not because I believe that cosplay IS consent, but because I believe  that no, we don't need reminded.  Most of us are rational thinking people who know the difference between right and wrong, and have proven it.  And as for the "still some who did not get that" comment, the one thing I heard of was a female friend getting rufied at a party where her bitter, nasty ex-girlfriend was serving the drinks.  (And the only reason nothing was done by any of us was because we didn't know about it until after the con was over, and no proof could be obtained.)

So, barring one awful event, con was pretty good.  3 years in the Jurassic Park gear, and people still love it, and are still wanting pictures.  I had a random girl ditch her friends Saturday night to come tell me how much she liked it. Thursday night was like a family reunion of us old timers, and we went through 4 gallons of Carl's bloodwine (and by we I mean maybe 5 of us).  Nobody was hurt, everybody had fun.

So, yeah.  Faith in (geek) humanity, restored.

-The Dinosaur Hunter

Classic Geeks vs. Modern Geeks

Yep.  I'm a geek.  But not in the way you might think.  Not in the way that's portrayed and glamorized now with such pop-culture dribble like "The Big Bang Theory" or "King of the Nerds."  That's not geekery, as far as I'm concerned.  And I'll explain the difference.

My first exposure to anything that could be considered to fall into the "geek" category was 'round about 1988.  My soon-to-be Dad (nevermind that) let me watch "Ghostbusters."  I was instantly hooked.  I don't know how many times I watched that movie.  And when the cartoon "The Real Ghostbusters" started selling toys, I had damn near all of 'em.  There was no term for it back other than "fan," but I was a total fanboy.

My grandpa introduced me to the world of sci-fi.  It started with Star Trek (The Next Generation to begin with, and exploded outward), and went on from there.  Some of my fondest memories are sitting on his couch watching the "Action Pack" on our local WGN affiliate, with Xena and Hercules.  That was followed by Star Trek: Deep Space Nine.  Then flip it over at 9 and watch Highlander (in fact, because of that, Highlander was the first TV show I ever bought on DVD).  He also introduced me to the incredible world of British sci-fi.  Our two local PBS stations would show things like Blake's 7, Red Dwarf, and Doctor Who.  And I loved every second of it.  I'd spend my days trying to make a communicator to hail the Enterprise, or make pictures of the TARDIS landing in the Cretaceous era (yeah, the dinosaur thing had hit too).  I remember going to elementary school and telling my friends about these shows (the British shows, anyhow), and them not knowing what the Hell I was talking about.  It was great.

My geekery followed me straight through into high school.  And that's where my world differs from the world now.  And no, I'm not gonna cry about how hard high school was, or how much I was bullied, or any of that.  Because we all were.  That's what high school is.  4 years of crap.

I went through a major Trekkie resurgence in high school.  Probably because I had just moved schools halfway through my eighth grade year, and it was Trek that helped me meet my first friend there.  We talked about it a lot, even played games with LEGO ships in our spare time (the game turned into basically play-acting, then just written stories about our own universe).

I was constantly called gay.  For no other reason than because I liked "Star Track."  And because I constantly hung out with my 2 other friends who liked it.  Which is kind of a funny reasoning, because no one else wanted to be friends with us, so who else would we hang out with?  Now, bear in mind, we were nothing like what springs to mind at the word "Trekkie."  The only time I've ever worn a Starfleet uniform was Halloween when I was in 6th grade.  We'd go to the local conventions, but never made a big deal out of it, or even really discussed it at school.  I had a few Trek t-shirts, but rarely, if ever, wore anything like that to school.  We didn't refer to each other as "Captain" or "Mister Spock."  Yet given the opportunity, we were picked on at every turn due to that one reason.  Hell, even teachers would make their snide remarks or little cutting jabs.  All of this over an extra-curricular interest that we were keeping to ourselves.  Another interesting note to keep in mind--all this only applied to us 3 Trekkies.  We'd get verbally accosted by Star Wars fans, surrounded by their jock buddies.  To this day I find that interesting.

Geek was never said with pride.  It was an insult that was spat at you.  A way to remind you that you were uncool, didn't fit in, were socially awkward in some way, and few people liked you.  And I was used to things being that way.  Then in the last 6 or so years, things changed.  Suddenly, the things I liked were getting to be more popular.  Comic book paraphernalia was showing up more often in more places.  I could wear a shirt with a geeky reference and was getting thumbs-ups and complements.  It was something of a relief.  I thought maybe this was what it was like being an adult around adults.  Then, in 2009, the Star Trek reboot was released. I think that was that catalyst to show me what was really going on.

My wife picked me up from work the night we saw it for the first time.  Now, admittedly, I was doing some of the things I bitch about people doing constantly.  If anything wasn't canon, I'd make a snide little joke about it.  I pretended for months to be upset about them recasting Captain Kirk (yes, pretended.  I'm a geek, not an out-of-touch purist).  And when the movie was over, my inner geek was conflicted, but as a whole I was satisfied.  It was a fun movie, the effects were great, the story was a little weak, but whatever.  I was entertained.  But when the same people (or same type of people) who made my life a living hell years earlier would say to me "have you seen that new Star Trek movie?  It's good!" I about lost it.  No, not flipped my shit on them, just on the whole thing in general.  My brain is screaming "Star Trek is NOT cool!  Star Trek is mine!  And how dare you, after making me miserable for liking it, walk up to me and tell me how good it is!  Eat shit."  But I smile, and I'll let them talk geek at me like they know what they're doing.

Then started all the costuming (I fucking detest the word "cosplay")....no.  Then started all the cosplay drama.  And I change it to "cosplay" drama because it's all a bunch of irritating fucking little girls and the mentally deficient boys that clamor all over them that call it that and cause all the problems.

A tiny bit of back story.  I met my wife, K, at a con in 2008.  The local con here n Denver was her "relax con," but she had several friends in the area and would come to hang out.  But at the time, she was a fairly active Star Wars costumer.  Her shit is incredible (and I'm not just saying that because she's my wife).  She puts countless hours into research.  She can watch a British show on grainy 1980s film stock and tell you not only what material Rowan Atkinson's costume is made of, but how it's put together, and what it's most likely lined with (yes, this actually happened about a month ago, watching Blackadder).  She was the founding member of a big Star Wars fan group in the Phoenix area.  But you'll never see her work viral around the groups and pages on Facebook, or front-paging the latest trendy web magazine, because she has 2 things against her in this new age of geekdom:  She's over 21, and she doesn't costume mostly naked.  She gets a little bummed sometimes that her work goes mostly unnoticed by the masses, but she also takes solace in the fact that she knows her work will last.  She can wear her costumes for more than one day of a con.

Sorry, got sidetracked.  We were talking about problems.

In November of last year, a comic artist named Tony Harris apparently went off his meds and posted a nice little rant singling out girls at cons.  Enjoy--

 Now, that rant makes him look like a total knuckle-dragger, and definitely puts him in the minority of con-going males (well, I'd assume.  I don't hang out with dicks at con.).  But what it also did was give an excuse to declare war on everything with a Y chromosome at a convention.  Yes, I know there are those guys that see a girl in latex and think that, since they're at a con, they can touch.  I know there are guys that will walk up and say "nice tits" and other random, socially unacceptable shit like that in the con setting.  But not all of us.  

Me and others like me have no use for the "geek girl" label.  You're a geek, or you're not.  Sex has nothing to do with it.  (The only "geek girl" I'll rage against isn't limited to the fairer sex.  It's anybody that buys horn-rimmed glasses, wears their Batman shirt and watches Big Bang Theory screaming "OMG that is SO me and my friends, we're such nerds" and that's the only remotely geeky thing they do or have ever done.)  But I end up taking things personal that I really shouldn't when I see the girls banding together to fight these guys at the cons.  I know they're not coming after me, because I'm not doing the things they're pissed about.

I got into a fight with a little girl one night (and yes, I mean that the nasty way it sounds), because I was just making the point that the guys that are calling them out on their geek-cred aren't worth the energy they're wasting on them.  

I also made the mistake of saying I understand some of the struggle.  Oh Christ, you'd think I DeLorean-hopped back to the 1960s and kicked the Women's Rights movement right in the uterus.  Now I'm just another deluded man that thinks he understands the woman's struggle, when that wasn't what I meant at all.  I know what it's like to be discriminated against for my interests.  In some smaller circles within the culture, it still happens.  Example: K and I have decided that we're going to realize a childhood dream of mine and put together Ghostbuster costumes.  Fully built proton packs and all.  I know for a fact that I will catch shit from some of the people established in the Ghostbusters fandom because I have zero intention on making our packs 100% screen accurate.  I know this because I see purists fight the non-purists on forums every time I get on.  That is also geek-on-geek hate.  Being called a fag every day because I spend my time a certain way is geek discrimination.  I don't understand the woman's struggle.  I can't, because of my penis.  But I said that they wouldn't give these mouth-breathers the time of day in the real world, why waste your energy on them during something you paid money to have fun at?

Needless to say I was pummeled with woman's studies-esque exclamations of "MISOGYNY IS PERVASIVE!" and told I was a privileged male who would have been considered less ignorant had I kept my mouth shut, because nobody said ALL guys were doing this.  Funny, misogyny is pervasive, but misandry is acceptable.

I know, I know.  I take things too personal.  Nobody was referencing me.  I'm pissed at these "boys only" geeks too, because their actions make me look bad just for being there.  If I complement a girl on her costume after she spent the whole day dealing with those dicks, what's gonna be her first thought?  Something along the lines of "fucking really, this again," and I'm gonna get the shrug off.  And anybody that says otherwise is just plain wrong.  It's human nature.  That's the point I was trying to get across.

So, way too fucking long story short, geekdom has changed.  The Baby Boomers started it, making the first Star Trek conventions.  My generation made it acceptable to be a geek.  We turned the cons into what they are now.  We took costuming to the next level.  And I welcome the generations coming up behind us.  Embrace it, and enjoy it.  Just stop thinking you started it.  You're not doing anything new.  And to all you classic geeks trying to act like the new kids?  Stop it.  A 50 year old Klingon guy hanging out with an 18 year old anime boobs-a-poppin' girl is not only sad, it's creepy as fuck.

-The Dinosaur Hunter